Change of direction

So a recent event has turned my whole surrogacy journey upside down. I was supposed to go to New Orleans yesterday to meet the IM and do medical screening but I had to make a choice, a very hard choice, and I didn't go. This is what happened:

The Saturday before (I was supposed to leave Monday) my brother in law came over for dinner. He lives in CO and we haven't seen him or my sister in law for a while due to distance. But he was in town for a conference so came over. He and my SIL have been trying to have a baby but were having difficulties. I knew their last IVF transfer was not a success but was under the impression that they were done trying. I had not told them that I was moving forward with surrogacy because I knew it was going to be hard for my husband and SILs parents to accept so we decided not to tell his family till it was "real". Well, over the course of the afternoon he shared with us that they had in fact gone through retrieval again and have 6 viable embryos. I was so excited for them that I went ahead and spilled the news that I was going to meet with my IM in two days and do the medical screening. He congratulated me and we had a nice evening. Well around 10:30 that night my husband gets a call from his sister and it turns out that the main reason my BIL was coming over was to ask us to be thir surrogate. He decided not to ask when I told him we were already in the process but she really wanted this and wanted to see if there was any way we would reconsider. So needless to say I got no sleep that night. I had to decide in one day, that Sunday what I would do. I had not done contracts with the other couple or met them in person but I did feel a connection to them and did not want to let them down. I chose to be a surrogate to bring joy into the world, to help a couple achieve their dream of having a baby. I never ever wanted to hurt anyone. Now I was being forced into that situation. No matter what I did, someone was getting hurt. So my husband and I had some really long talks and we both had really long talks with his sister and ultimately I had to choose family. I wrote the other couple a letter explaining my decision as best I could and begged for forgiveness. It was never my intent to hurt them and I feel terrible about it. But I just couldn't say no to family. It would be my niece or nephew I would be helping enter the world. Though I am terribly sorry for the other couple I feel confidant that the agency will find a new surrogate for them and that a beautiful baby is in their future. I am at peace with my decision. More details to come:)

Finally progress

So we finally have a date set for me to fly to New Orleans for my medical evaluation. I fly out and the appointment is on Monday October 28th. So excited!  I think they are doing a mock cycle too. I'll update again the day of the appointment.